Objects in the Mirror are closer then they appear.

Greetings fellow umm, I don't know what to call you guys anymore, whatever. Today I would like to discuss Rattling Moon's expiremental single, Objects in the Mirror are Closer than the appear. It's simple lyrics are met with ambient guitar and and melodic, intoxicating bass. A simple techno influenced drum beat proceeds in the background. The end result is rather odd and is not something that those who do not listen to expiremental music would appreciate, those who do like it will enjoy. Here is the link towards the single on souncloud, below is a video of the song without the guitar part. 

https://soundcloud.com/rattlingmoon/objects-in-mirror-are-closer-than-they-appear

Anything weird or disturbing is artsy.

For Halloween, i watched Gore Verbinski's mastery of suspense, "the ring" . In the ring, none of the characters are hipster, though one presumably plays guitar due to a stratacaster in the background of the movies most famous scene. However, when i saw the haunted video in the ring, i thought, wow, that is so hipster artsy-like. The film has many disturbing images, and for some is the most unsettling moments in the movie, however, if one views it as art, it is so much cooler. Samara, if you put that video in the M.O.M.A (Museum of modern art) you would kill so many hipsters.

       However, you can find hipster art in things intended for a more mainstream audience, for instance college humor's attempt to poke fun at modern music video's. It was so disturbing and subsequently very artsy. It actually seems to make miley cyrus intelligent, which is ridiculous.
        Most things can translate as art. the only thing that stops something from being art is an unexcepting person in power. Art is in the eyes of the beholder, and if the beholder is a hipster, more controversial things are excepted.
            Salutations,
                Nate y Pablo

Hipsters bands: the chemists of music.

A story of hipster scientists.

"Alright Jeff, hand me a graduated cylinder, fill it with 15ml of indie producer, remove any famous bands or music awards under his label. Alright, lets add some psychedelic art, yes, very colorful very good."

        "Oh no, Steve, the bacteria seems to be attracted to this serum, quick add some post grunge influence!" 

          "Its not working, Jeff, I'll try to add some deep depressing lyrics, you know, none of those lyrics about sex and drugs like pop music. Make the song at least three times longer than any song heard on the radio."

          "Good idea, i'll add a....ummm.....Oh, I've got it, i child dealing with depression."

          "Yes, good thinking, try adding an unrequited love, and a slow progression into insanity, yes it's working, NO! Wait, this can't be, they bacteria are simply eating it up, did you put a dramatic, overused piano chord change in?"

        "I think i did. It was an accident, Steve. Ill add some feedback from the guitar amplifier, yes, and influences from prog rock."

     "Yes, keep going."

        "I'll remove the common metre, would a 7/8 metre work?"

       "Yes! Add some loose screw on the drum set, especially focus on the snare."
        "We did it! The world won't be ours, because very few will listen to them, but we have made the perfect hipster rock band, I'll call their music, indie grunge swing revival!"   

           The end

Actual post for today.

            Greeting fellow hipsters, how many genres of music do you listen to that fit into a simple, single word category. None, just as i suspected. Today i shall explain how hipsters are the chemists of music, well more like biochemists. We hipsters combine types of music to see what will happen, similar to the man who added fish d.n.a to the red tomato to make it preserve more effectively. 

       G.E scientists work every day to create plants that will produce greater amounts of crops, so they can feed more homo-sapiens, and make their industry more lucrative. Hipsters blend all different types of music together to see what shocks an audience the most, but we don't ado it for money. If the hipster is greedy, he doesn't have the makings of a true hipster.

        Mostly, the hipster attempts to mix things never before attempted to bring out the most unnusual results, sort of like Greek mythology, where we have donkey, robot, vampire people, and no, i did not learn about empusa through Percy Jackson and the Olympians. (Hipster rule # 467, know about Greek mythology before you read Percy Jackson)               

       Just remember, if you have fish d.n.a in you, you probably should listen to a genre of music nobody has ever heard of. What's your favorite genre of music, Comment below.

          Salutations

                 PNaabtleoY

Long songs, and why they are delectable

    This is a follow up from my post on sunday.


           I was just halfway through mountain jam by the Allman brothers band, the first 18 minutes were pretty good.  
         Greetings, followers. today we delve into the expansive universe of songs that are longer than most people have the patients to listen to. Yesterday, I posted the 19 minute epic, grand deign, the link is in the last post, I personally doubt all of my views paid heed to all 19 minutes of musical goodness. Patience is a virtue that many lack in this ever hastening society we found forced upon us at birth. Personally, I like to test my patience, which sometimes to be volatile, listening to songs that require strong concentration to understand.
        The longest song in human history(long player) is little over a hundredth the way through. It has currently been playing since the turn of he millennium, however, it wont repeat itself till the year three thousand, but personally it is dull to listen too. It is sort of an ambiance, lacking theme or melody. Guinness may consider it a song, but I consider it an expansive art form.

The set of long player.

    But than, what is a "song". song, sang, sing. Does a song require singing? if so, Hurst's epic 44 minute contemporary classical composition, "the planets" is not considered a song. By that matter, nor is mountain jam.
     For that reason, I have divided art in the form of sound into two huge overlapping categories, auditory art, and melodic auditory art. Pretty self explanatory. For example, the beatles's revolution #9 fits into the category of auditory art.
     Sorry, for that sort of vsauce style departure from the topic.

    It bothers me that when confronted with led zeppelins stairway to heaven, most of the students in my grade cower. Lacking both the courage and open mindedness to accept that in comparison of other songs, it is not too lengthy, they claim that they will never listen to the full song because they have no time.
     I find long songs to be better than short songs, because the limiting factors of time are all but disbanded, free bird can have a 7 minute long guitar solo, and something in the way by nirvana can have ten minutes of silence in the middle of it. There can be nine parts to shine on you crazy diamond, and Robert fripp can experiment however much he wishes in moon child.
   Normally a to fit more lyrics in a song, nowadays, they are merely rapped for effiency. however, a whole story of really depressing crap are sung in most long pieces of auditory art. Also the comment wars below are more funny, if you listen on youtube.   
    Another hipster factor of long songs, it splitting songs into different parts, I.e neutral milk hotel's king of carrot flowers. It has a ring to it, _________________ pt VII. (hipster rule # 480: use the roman numeral system.
salutations,                                               Enter song title
 Pablo y nate.                     
   

Grand designs

 If you are a fan of the band dream theater, you will love this.
I am constantly amazed by the amount of talent people that nobody appreciates, please watch this video, because 258lemons needs to get a record deal.
        

Pet peeve: hipsters taking it to far.

This weeks pet peeve: hipsters taking it to far.
            

Being hipster is a choice, and we don't force our opinions on others, no matter how bad their taste in music is. What truly irks me is when a hipster refuses to participate in conversation, or likewise situations because something bugs them about the premises.
      Sadly, those hipsters are the only ones that seem to get noticed and they represent us poorly. Similar to arabs, most of us aren't radicals, but those are the ones you've heard of. Don't be ignorant readers. sometimes a might jokingly say to somebody, "I cant be your friend" when they don't know who Robert Fripp is. but I don't mean it. If you are a hipster, and you are ofeten more than a little bit difficult when you here pop music, than shame on you. Do you seriously want everybody to listen to your music? That would both take away the whole point of being hipster and what we have to complain about. We re meant to be the only ones who listen to our music, if more people than that, it wouldn't be hipster music.
   An example of this which to this day both amuses me and saddens me is when there were exchange students from Modi'im, Israel in my school in New York. There was a student, clad in a dream theater t-shirt, skinny jeans, and a fedora. This teenager was pleasant for the most part, however when their was a meeting with all of the hosts and all of the students, there was a Jason Mraz song playing in the video presentation.
    With many a complaint in Hebrew, the boy stormed from the room claiming he would not reenter till the music choice was changed. DON"T BETHAT GUY.
Have you ever had an experience with a hipster extremist, if so comment below. Hey! that's a couplet, did I mention I also write poetry.

salutations

nate y Pablo.

Hipster rule # 459

Interperate every thing as modern art, by claiming it represents the human condition or somethinglike that. make really simple art, example:  take a broken watering can and draw the word "hate" on it and claim the can represents society and its broken and pouring hate all over everybody. It makes you seem especially hipster if you appreciate the type of art where it is a blank canvas with a dot is the middle.


    If you like any modern art, comment below.
Salutaions,

Pablo y nate

Esme squalor: the ultimate not hipster

     Villainous and fashionable, the worst combination ever. Especially if the villainess in question is Esme Gigi Geniveve Squalor, an abomination fabricated by the elusive author, proclaiming himself lemony snicket. 
       A brief description of Esme. Esme is the cities 6th most important financial advisor living on the 66th floor of 667 dark avenue. She cheats on her husband and has a hobby of kidnapping children. She will do anything if its in. Esme is obsessed with whether something is "in" or "out", meaning trending or not. She will change the whole entire décor and garb just to keep her stature as the most "in" person in the world. If something is "out" she will shun and to away with the item in question, even if the item in question is three innocent orphans.
     Like most of Snicket's characters, she has a very opaque back story that we know very little of. But the real question is if being hipster was "in", what would Esme do?


    You have all been blown in the mind with my paradox. comment who you think is the least hipster character in a book.


salutations,

Pablo y nate.

Gingers have souls.

    Every day gingers are subject to cruelty and verbal abuse. As they struggle through life, they begin to question why they are persecuted. What spawned the belief that our fellow humans, red of hair, and noble of heart, are lacking their souls? For this we look to the most diabolical racist in the history of cartoon. Screw you eric cartman. You are the cause of a genocide of the pure, fire-headed carrot tops. You spread your lies for your own selfish reasons, just for laughs. You truly are a monster.                                                                                                                                                                                      

      Gingers make up only 1-2% of the worlds population, yet their influence is undeniable, they are all descendants of the Weasleys. 
      It is ridiculous to suggest that gingers don't have souls. Gingers are just as human as the rest of us, and more than most. Its so hipster to say that if your hair was on fie nobody would notice.
     One of my hipster friends from new York was ginger and he clearly believed he had a soul, as do my other ginger friends. in Detroit, I have met few gingers as of yet. The one I have met was kind enough to give me four baby carrots at lunch today, I showed her much gratitude by thanking her profusely  and saying her hair was more orange.
The one anomaly is the ginger who believes that gingers don't have souls. It is like being muggle born and calling your self a mudblood, speaking of witch(ha ha get it) i'm going to a very potter musical on Saturday.               
           Every body, please support gingers. If you see something like this.

Take a stand

 

 If your a ginger and you want your voice to be heard, comment below.

 

nate y Pablo

 

Hats.

        Hats: Noun, something that most hipsters have, but none can agree on which is most hipster.



     Greetings all, before I begin today, i'd like to make a few shout outs. First to all my viewers especially the ones from out of the country, second to Motown guitars. When I moved to Detroit, I was quite worried about where I would by guitars. There was a sketchy looking store near my house in new York where all the hipsters would go and buy music gear. This place was called the sound source. If you're from upstate new York, I strongly recommend it. Though sometimes lacking in variety of instruments, the sound source shop worker dudes were some of the more hipster people I've met. We knew each other by name and they sold things inexpensively. Today, while buying a new set of guitar strings, I came across a store with two huge les pauls on the facade, angling towards the ground opening for the doorway of the store.
    The place was huge, and there were many guitars and pedals and amps and accessories sold inexpensive.




Hats.

Hipster hats According to some





Hipster hat according to others

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       What is a hipster hat. What is it's purpose? I'm actually drawn ablank hear because I wear my fedoras every day and people always ask if its a hipster hat, but I get the same affect if I wear a beanie. Why do hipsters need a hat style.
      Giving a group of people a particular attribute may make them appear unified, however hipsters are more versatile than non hipsters as there is so much more stuff that is not popular than stuff that is. So a hipster doesn't need to wear only one type of hat. This is how fashion works in the hipster world.

Sal

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Nate y Pablo

Why Hipsters don't like things that are mainstream.

         As a hipster, I commonly strive to bring new odd Avant-garde and previously undiscovered interests into the community. The people who choose to listen to my suggestions in music and literature are followers. The reason I like finding things nobody has thought of before is because it makes one feel an individual. The average person has various amounts of ideas shoveled onto them like their a patch of farmland, and these popular beliefs are like heaps of manure, fresh clean and stinking to high heaven.

      The poor patch of farmland has no time to filter what is being loaded upon it and whether or not he wants all that crap on him at all. It can't decide whether the new mulch is better than the old mulch is better, but the farmer forces upon the new processed cheapest and most popular brand of industrialized animal droppings. Likewise, the farmland has no say of what plants grow out.
         If the farmland was a hipster instead of a patch of dirt in the middle of nowhere, it would have these choices, and his self proclamation as hipster would develop a shield to society around it. Maybe instead of growing kale, which is mainstream, it could sprout habaneros or bok choy. The farmer could blend these two veggies and make a type of Chinese Mexican chili. The farmer of course would be very dependent of his pitchfork.
          Those who are into what is current are slaves to popular culture. They need to read fashion magazines, watch pretty little liars and listen to #1 hit radio. Being hipster is like having a burden lifted off your shoulders with the perk of finding better and more interesting sources of entertainment. Forget about team gale vs team Jacob, you could be reading the odyssey or the complete works of Edgar Allen Poe. A hipster, a nerd, a geek and an art fart don't worry about appearing cool, which makes them cool in their own way. So next time you are buying an 80$ pair of jeans at A&F, ask yourself, "What the hell am i doing?"

If you are in a loopy enough mood, break out in song.

If you do post the video on the internet and leave a link in the comments.

Don't be a patch of smelly kale plants, be original like bok choy.

Salutations,

Nate.

If Countries Were Social Classes, Canada would be the hipster.

Lets face it, when was Canada ever mainstream. Though most Canadians are not hipster, I think it would be super hipster to be Canadian. Saying im American doesn't ring. There are 300000000 americans. Being American is so mainstream. True, there are many less populous countries than Canada, but Canada is on top of the u.s, who would be the jock country. Canada just chills with us like a groovy cucumber that is covered in moose. Northern Canada is the arctic circle. How unmainstream is it to live near Santa Clause?
       

Aside from the fact that santas workshop is under water because the north pole is covered by a sheet of ice, and everybody knows who he is, and he creeps on every Christian child on the globe, santa could be a Canadian hipster.   
      Another hipster thing about Canada is that their are just enough famous Canadians for people to know that Canada exists, but there aren't very many mainstream Canadians. I go to summer camp in Canada, now that's hipster.


Now for a Canadian joke.

Q: How did Canada Get Its Name
A: C-Eh-N-Eh-D-Eh


Anyway, lately I realized that to many hipsters use pitchfork review, when I searched it on yahoo,(google is to current) it was the top result. It is now mainstream.

Ironic salutations
Pablo y nate

Hipster rule # 458

Go thrift shopping. I went today and got a red hot chili peppers shirt, a Metallica shirt, a Bruce Springsteen shirt, and a Lynyrd Skynyrd shirt, a mickey mouse shirt, skinny jeans, a flannel, and a purple button down for about ten $. Complete hipster garb.  They were selling records for ten cents apiece. Hipster heaven.
          Hipster's usually wear really cheap or really expensive clothing. But this is the human speaking not the hipster, don't drive yourself broke with name brands, and don't sing that rap song about thrift shopping if you do, because Macklemore is to mainstream.
If you got any cool shirts at a thrift shop, comment below.

hipster movies.

       As a hipster, I strongly encourage all hipsters to watch movies made for fans by progressive  musicians. They have been some of the most strange and disturbing moments of my life. My frirst time watching pink Floyd's, "the Wall" I was in the seventh grade. I was watching a wall concert while doing my homework and noticed that their were many video clips during the film. I decided to do some further research and found the movie on youtube. There was many a shocking and scarring image in that movie, particularly in another brick in the wall part 2, one of my turns, comfortably numb and the trial. The movie s a whole made very little sense and kept me awake in my bed long after the lights turned out. I loved it and have never been able to listen to the album the same.                    

But the weirdest prog rock movies are from the late great frank Zappa and they are so off-putting that they make the wall look like a film you would take your children too. They are still enjoyable. Many feature guitar virtuoso, Steve Vai. A little tangent here, this Is why vai is awesome.

Hipsters also watch indie movies such as the perks of being a wall flower and another earth. Lately I've been into scott pilgrim vs the world. If you know any goo hipster movies, place them in the comments, if you are feeling especially ambitious, start a comment war for my entertainment.

tcms jazz band

here's a video of my jazz band from New York.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KSCVZ5_L0E
 

The lucid frogs

Hey guys,

            Here's a video of my band, enjoy.