What i'd look like if my favorite band was nominated for a Grammy

Is Daario Naharis a hipster?

For those who were wondering who Daario Naharis is, you should not read this post. For those who watch the HBO TV show, this is about the books portrayal of the Tyroshi captain, not the televised misrepresentation.
            Accompanied with some funky hair dye, a flamboyant persona, a very interesting bear, and a golden mustache, lavish clothing and a thirst for action, this Tyroshi stone crow added color to Daenerys's khalasar and army, but is he a hipster?

         The Tyroshi people are known to be eccentric, they are a rich culture, bright colors, and elaborate helms. Though often warring with other cities, the Tyroshi's all could seem like hipsters compared to Westeros and other free cities. However, among the citizens of Tyrosh, Daario Naharis still is considered an anomaly among his city mates. He goes above and beyond the other Tyroshi in his flamboyancy. True, he is reckless, but he seems educated. We don't know what type of music he listens to, however, their were only three popular songs in Westeros, and they all are written in the same style,and music is hard to come by, as their are solely singers and bards in that time period.
       I conclude that Daario is a hipster among hipsters, and us hipsters shall pray that martin doesn't kill him, like he did everybody else.
          saLUTations
P ab lo y Na te

A life summarized in a quote

"I think life is far too short to concentrate on your past. I rather look into the future"-a great musician and a great man.

R.I.P
Pablo and Nate.

25 or 6 to 4, bhhs jazz band

Booster concert 2013, playing some Chicago.

Bhhs jazz band

In the stone, bhhs jazz band

Hipsters bands: the chemists of music.

A story of hipster scientists.

"Alright Jeff, hand me a graduated cylinder, fill it with 15ml of indie producer, remove any famous bands or music awards under his label. Alright, lets add some psychedelic art, yes, very colorful very good."

        "Oh no, Steve, the bacteria seems to be attracted to this serum, quick add some post grunge influence!" 

          "Its not working, Jeff, I'll try to add some deep depressing lyrics, you know, none of those lyrics about sex and drugs like pop music. Make the song at least three times longer than any song heard on the radio."

          "Good idea, i'll add a....ummm.....Oh, I've got it, i child dealing with depression."

          "Yes, good thinking, try adding an unrequited love, and a slow progression into insanity, yes it's working, NO! Wait, this can't be, they bacteria are simply eating it up, did you put a dramatic, overused piano chord change in?"

        "I think i did. It was an accident, Steve. Ill add some feedback from the guitar amplifier, yes, and influences from prog rock."

     "Yes, keep going."

        "I'll remove the common metre, would a 7/8 metre work?"

       "Yes! Add some loose screw on the drum set, especially focus on the snare."
        "We did it! The world won't be ours, because very few will listen to them, but we have made the perfect hipster rock band, I'll call their music, indie grunge swing revival!"   

           The end

Actual post for today.

            Greeting fellow hipsters, how many genres of music do you listen to that fit into a simple, single word category. None, just as i suspected. Today i shall explain how hipsters are the chemists of music, well more like biochemists. We hipsters combine types of music to see what will happen, similar to the man who added fish d.n.a to the red tomato to make it preserve more effectively. 

       G.E scientists work every day to create plants that will produce greater amounts of crops, so they can feed more homo-sapiens, and make their industry more lucrative. Hipsters blend all different types of music together to see what shocks an audience the most, but we don't ado it for money. If the hipster is greedy, he doesn't have the makings of a true hipster.

        Mostly, the hipster attempts to mix things never before attempted to bring out the most unnusual results, sort of like Greek mythology, where we have donkey, robot, vampire people, and no, i did not learn about empusa through Percy Jackson and the Olympians. (Hipster rule # 467, know about Greek mythology before you read Percy Jackson)               

       Just remember, if you have fish d.n.a in you, you probably should listen to a genre of music nobody has ever heard of. What's your favorite genre of music, Comment below.

          Salutations

                 PNaabtleoY

Hipster rule# 466

Greeting fellow hipsters, If you have recently became informed of a musician that you enjoy, buy their earlier music. Don't just jump on a lonely bandwagon and get whats current, work your way up by examining any progress or change the artist in question has undergone. Failing to abide by this rule sets you as non hipster as Nikki  Manaj, because whats current is seldom hipster, no matter how amazing it is. Listen to earlier music so you can say, oh their new stuff is so processed, their old stuff is so much better. If you ever see him/her/them/it/smeagol/other in concert and he/she/it/dobby/other announces that their playing an oldie, from their earlier days, you and all their other hipster fans can yell, "I know that song!"
    You can also claim, "I listened to them before you knew they existed!"
     Salutations
       Pablo                          Y                    N
                                                                 A
                                                                     T  E

Pet peeve: when people claim they love a band and can only name one of their songs

Don't you love it when you're playing Zeppelin on guitar, and your friend asks you to play stairway to heaven cause they LOOOOOVVVVE Led Zeppelin, and that's the only Zeppelin song they know.
               By "love" i mean hate.
             

    Greetings fellow followers of bands that only had one famous song that people still know today, today i shall rant about the lack refinement in our musical culture-again. It is perfectly fine to not listen to a band and not respect them. It is perfectly alright to not listen to a band and respect them, but to not listen to a band and LOOOOOOVE them, only having heard that song of theirs that was popular in the 70's. People should commit to their band, the white stripes didn't only write seven nation army, and the song seven nation army is more than "OOOOH-OH-OH-OH-OH-OOOOOOH-OOOH" its a time out at a football game song. The point is, listen to a band before you "love them."
        Salutations,
                Pablo
                    y
                       Nate.

Me and my brother attempt to blues up hit the road jack.

If ray charles had a bedtime  it would be hard for him to record too.
      However, my brother cant be an r&b star yet.
          Salutations
              Pablo t Nate

How hipsters get around

Salutations

pAbLo y naTe

Amazing hipster album: In the court of the crimson king

Greetings fellow hipsters, today we shall explore one of the best albums in the history of progressive rock: In the court of the crimson king. This 1969 debut album from king crimson has jazz, blues, rock and roll, and random noise influences. It is one of the more influential progressive rock albums and is on par with Moving Pictures and Dark Side of the Moon. The famous 21st century schizoid man is the most well known song off the album, so instead i decided to show you moonchild as the song that best represents the album. Moonchild is 12 minutes in length and experiments with dissonance and ambiance. Another hipster album will be coming next sunday. What's your favorite hipster album?
     Comment below,
          SaLutAtIoNs
            Pablo y Nate

Hipster quote

"Quotes are to demeaning an polarizing, i refuse to present a generalization to a group of people you know very little about, so you can turn it into a meme. Don't quote this." - a hipster

Salutations
   Pablo y Nate

pet peeve: the use of texting acronyms

Omg lol, isn't it  gr8 wen peeple b talkin 2 u in reel life and say, lmao, brb, kk. NOT

          Greetings, fellow hipsters,  If you could understand what i just said above, i commend you/ how do you under stand such a primitive, minimalist style of speaking. people respond, "lol" it translates into- i have nothing better to say, this is the most boring conversation i have ever wasted breath engaging in". It doesn't make one seem more intelligent to say, 'Btw, rofl'. It just makes you sound like a lack-wit. The problem is that these annoying texting abbreviations they are more frequent than emos at a black veil bride concert because people are so lazy. It takes 72 muscles to talk, exercise them, or your face will be as weak as your mind is. Personally i think texting is to mainstream in general, but that is up to opinion. Here are some examples of alternatives to the shortened texting speach.
           Rofl:  I am simply drowning in glee, for that clever retort you just uttered was one of the more witty notions i have ever had the pleasure to bear witness to.
           Ttyl: i bid you fare well, my dearest of acquaintances, if the god in heavens is good, pray tell we shall have the honor of meeting in a future context.
          Brb: i offer you my most sincere apologies, however more pressing matters have just came to my attention, and i must ensue them or the consequences will be dire.  Most likely i shall be returning to you with a prompt and hasty attitude.
          Wth: why, what an unusual occurrence, i feel the need to announce my befuddlement through an interjection.



          Also another sad thing in the world of the english language, the word ginormous has been officialy added to the merriam webster dictionary, Please don't use it.

          Any way gtg
            SalUtatioNs,
                 Pablo y Nate

Hipster rule# 465

Disclaimer: i am breaking this rule to the furthest extent with this blog, but it is for educational purposes.

 

Hipsters don't believe in labels, if something has a label, it can be generalized. That is what happened to hipsters. Now the hipsters one of the more hated and emulated sub culture. Seriously, when somebody asks me what i am being for Halloween, i respond, 'i don't dress in a costume, because that would be giving something a label. If i give myself a label than i will succumb to popular culture'. But seriously, labels are not for the benefit of society. Smart people in todays society, especially in schools, are slandered as nerds, which is considered a dorrogatory term, what nerd actually means is "You're smarter than me, screw you"

          salutations, 

                   PabLO y naTe

true Virtuosity means versatility

      Many musicians pride themselves in their technical abilities, playing more and more complex runs, using more and more complex rhythms and scales. However, when told to play somethings with soul, less speedy and flashy, they are drawn a blank. Steve Vai is one of many guitarists that falls into this void, though he can play with emotion, he is locked into a certain sound. Listen to this example of him playing the blues.  
           A true virtuoso can play any style, some of my favourites include Jeff beck, Guthrie Govan and Ritchie Blackmore. For example, listen to deep purples lazy, and than listen to highway stars classical influenced solo sections.                          The point is, i don't care what modes you play in, i care if you have feel. Also, if you are not good at something, only try it if you really want to get good at something, because that is the only way you will. If Steve Vai wanted to play the blues, he could have, but instead he plays his shred licks, which are fine, just out of context.
      If you are truly a talented musician, you can adapt and play all genres because you respect them, unless your a classically trained musician, right out of Julliard, than you have permission to look down upon all other forms of music. Plant you're self in one genre, if you wish, but if you have enough technical skill, learn other genres, challenge yourself. Here is a funny video to compensate for the lack of humor in this post. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQDY5fH0sFc
salutaions,
 Pablo y nAtE

How hipsters crowd surf.

salutations
       Pablo Y naTe

Dr Heinz Doofenshmirtz, the hipster d.j

Oh, when Disney channel was still decent ......
             pablo y nate

If the music hipsters listened to went mainstream...

            Greetings fellow hipsters, today i am going to address a point that many hipsters ponder, but few would mention in conversation. what would we listen to if the music we like went mainstream? Honestly, it all depends on how hipster you are, if you are more about the actual music or being anti mainstream. I personally would listen to music if it was still of the same quality, and they weren't completely controlled by the record producers.
   But for a more orthodox hipster, the music isn't always the most important part, just how little notoriety it has. They appreciate individualism, i respect that. In a species with its population approaching ten billion, being unique is quite a virtue. Imagine you are a pinto bean in a black bean burrito, your taste may stick out when you are eaten, and it would be like a slap in the face to the eater, or asphyxiation, if the one devouring the burrito was deathly allergic to the pinto bean. The pinto bean may well have been planted by an outside source to assassinate the one eating the burrito. Actually, the man consuming the burrito was a man of high power, and controlled a technology that could change the aspect of how we lived. The government had attempt to silence him through their spies in the Mexican restaurant industry.
              What the heck am i talking about?
                Maybe that was a metaphor. If the pinto bean represents the unique hipster, than the burrito represents society, and the burrito eater represents the music, because
maybe the beans at him from the inside out. Maybe the burrito represents the everyday person, who is filled with a ton of sub personalities, but all in all, i believe that toads don't cause warts.
                      Basically, the point is, if hipster music went mainstream, hipsters would experience a schism, dividing those in it for the music and those in it for the thrill of being known as a hipster. However, many of us will be killed by poisoned burritos, ironically. Irony. Some of the individual hipsters will listen to the old hipster-now pop music to be ironic. Alright i've lost myself.

              Salutations,
                         Pablo y Nate.

Pet peeve: people mix up hippies and hipsters.

If you can tell the difference between these two images, than you should be able to tell the difference between a hippie and a hipster. The fact that the stereotypes  between these two social groups are so different but they can be overlooked by the similarities in the routes simply has me vexed. Doesn't it make you think when, if you are a hipster (If you are, greetings fellows) that you mean so little to the world  that you could get mixed up with these rainbow colored peacocks of peaceful ambidexterity.  Well, first off lets look at what we have in common, a stereotype of drug use, obscure clothing choices a fetish for music varying from the mainstream, and for alternate political views. However, despite these similarities, we hipsters dont compete with ourselves to see how many colors we can wear at once, we don't grow mustaches that look like we have clones of frank Zappa beneath our noses. We do not do psychedelics, because that isn't good for you. It's not like we don't think peace love and happiness is far out man, but we are happy and loving, when we don't have pieces of our sideburns in our mouths. If you remember my previous post about hats , if you click hats there will be a link to the post, however, its hard to put on a hat when your 'fro weighs more than  We hipsters do enjoy the outdoors, but we (most of the time) do have houses instead of tents. The point is that hippies and hipsters are very different, hippies have a cause and they protest, we hipsters aren't as organized as a whole, so we can't rally against pop music, likewise, the Vietnam war is long over, so hippies don't exist anymore. So if you are a hipster nowadays, remember, you are a figment of your own imagination, so in your own way, you are a hipster.

Salutations, 

pablo y nate

R.I.P Random afro dude,  who probably died of substance abuse

                                                      

How hipsters carve jackolanterns

Is Angela Of Tierm a hipster?

               Greetings fellow hipsters and today i will be continuing my series on evaluating whether or not random book characters are hipster or not. Today we will observe Angela the herbalist. Angela is a witty and somewhat eccentric character who is practiced in magic, soothsaying, fighting with mystical weapons that normally are only the arms of the dwarven  kings of old., and she has an outrageous  pet. She is by far the most funny character in the cycle, however, she lacks many of the aspects of a hipster. She does take alternative viewpoints, however, they are based upon scientific theory, not opinion. She doesn't clad herself in unusual clothing(to the time period and society in the book) or express a taste in indie music. We love Angela, however, she is not a hipster.
            Salutations,
         Pablo y Nate

Hipster rule# 464

                      Greetings fellow hipsters, today we will be explaining how to piss off non hipsters. Whenever a your friend who listens to an actual band that plays pop music, tell them that they sound terrible live. The live performance is somethings that has bee dwindling due to recording technology and the internet, but in times where live music is depleting, a stellar show is novelty. That is why pop music sucks. Rap bands don't have their techno-gizmo's to make their voices on key. And due to lack of instruments, the performance normally consists of one man prancing around with a flat brim hat, two or more chains, a gaggle of revealingly clad female dancers, and fans who were there because all of the good shows weren't advertised for. The eagles came to Detroit, and i wasn't aware of it for the lack of public media on the topic. Instead of the adverts for the eagles in periodicals, we found notices for Kid Cudi.
          Also, power metal bands such as Poizon or Dragon Force record songs in an extremely flashy and technical fashion because they make very hard guitar hero songs. The reason why they can't perform is because it is all fake. So be sure to comment on all of your pop culture consuming peers music, claiming the band in question sounds awful live.
        Comment on bands that you find dreadful,
salutations,
    Pablo y Nate.

How hipsters slice apples.

       

Me playing some blues

               Ignore the bad audio but remember to +1 and share and comment.
         Salutations,
                  Nate y pablo.

Pet peeve: Everybody hates hipsters.

When i searched why hipsters are awesome on yahoo the top ten results were "10 Reasons Why Hipsters Are Awful." . Top result was, "Hipsters are so awful || awesome cave.com"

          Greetings fellow hipsters, and today i will complain about how so many people think that we should spend our free time learning to juggle with chainsaws. True, from a distance, and from not so far away, and from really close up, a hipster can seem like an obnoxious self centered octopus who has its tentacles on lost of things others can't reach to look so much better than everybody else.  Well, we aren't octopi, and our tentacles, if we had tactlessness,  they would be on places you could reach, if you had heard of them.
              If you actually got to know a hipster, you would know their shell of pride and indifference is not very thick, and what lurks inside is actually not unpleasant to behold. We hipsters are not quite as inpersonable  as you'd imagine. We-
        alright, i can't think of a  reason why hipsters are better without making me sound self centered.

      See how courteous i am.
  Well, i have severely failed at explaining why hipsters aren't hate worthy, but we are actually not a hate worthy. Think of it this way, we don't hate non-hipsters, so don't hate us. Or octopi, because they are awesome.
          Salutations,
              Nate y Pablo

NOBODY ACTUALLY KNOWS WHAT A HIPSTER IS

      Hipsters have wider time frame to enjoy something than a non hipster, for example a hipster listens to a band nobodies heard of. On their next album, they have a hit, they are popular and the hipster shuns them. A few month later the band is deep underground again, and the hipster listens to them, even their hit to be ironic. But, what if the hipster listened to the band for irony while they were popular to shock his hipster friends? What if he shunned the band so much that he refused to listen to them? Do hipsters really have more time? Why do i ask myself these questions? WHAT IS A HIPSTER?
           People around the world, like me, ignorantly claim ultimate knowledge of what a hipster is, but not all of us wear scarfs, blue skinny jeans and 70s nerd glasses. I don't know how to define a hipster because hipsters are so diverse. I mean, are the people in bands that hipsters listen to hipsters? Has their minor fame gotten into there heads and do they listen to pop music or make music intended to be popular among hipsters? Does the record company enforce this?



         Now that you are all thoroughly confused, greeting fellow hipsters and today i will explain why we dont even know what a hipster is. Science has yet to find a genome and phylum for hipsters, and if hipsters were existent in ancient India, we wouldn't even have a caste because the people wouldn't know where to put us because they wouldn't actually know what a hipster is. In the cruel feudalism of the middle ages in Europe, the hipsters would just sit in the difference and talk about how there were no good leaders this day, and discuss obscure roman emperors.
      Right now, i am listening to wolf mail on groove shark. Wolf mail is an artist that i am pretty sure less than .001% of the worlds population has heard of, however the music he makes is the blues, which is not a hipster genre. Is it hipster to listen to wolf mail? I have my opinion, and im sure you do as well, however, there are so few hipster standards that are actually true we cant make any assumptions because there are so many nuances in hipster culture
           Some people believe that there are so few people that fit all of the characteristics of the stereotypical hipster that a hipster is purely a hypothetical concept, only mentioned so all of the extremes are covered. Imagine a chart of the types of economies, a true hipster would be a true capitalist society. They don't exist.
        I disagree, personally. I think that there must have been such thing as a hipster. Why else would hipster fashion be so in today, if people aren't all trying to mimic something something that was. Why would hipsters be so hated if they didn't exist, that would be like hating Hufflepuffs. If you get my reference +1 this post because Google plus is hipster.  
       Comment me your opinion of what a hipster is.
           Salutations
               Pablo y Nate
.

Hipster rule# 463

In movies that are bad, route for the bad guy.

          Greetings fellow hipsters, have you ever watched a movie where the acting was so cheesy, the characters were so dry, and it didn't follow the (if applies). Wouldn't they be better if the bad guy won. For those who cringed through the train-wreck excuse for a movie, Indiana Jones and the kingdom of the crystal skull, didn't we wish that   Colonel Dr. Irina Spalko didn't wake the aliens, and ruled the world so the worst excuse of a movie conclusion hadn't occurred. UFO's, SERIOUSLY SPIELBERG?

In Indiana Jones five, the bad guy better be entertaining, because sure as heck i'm not routing for Spielberg. The hipster takes a controversy side even in good movies. personally, i liked 006 in golden-eye because 007 was too popular. Of course gold-finger was still the best bond film. But Dr evil was such a bad rip off of Dr. Blofeld that everybody liked him in gold member, GO AUSTIN POWERS! 

        In case your in a movie, don't be the good guy, or i won't like you.

Salutations,

Pablo y Nate

Classical hipster music, Does it still exist?

    Sure, classical music has influenced everything besides rap which was influenced by a rabid raccoon in a sack getting beaten by a mace. But the question is, is there hipster classical music? What a hard question.  By hard I mean i'm going to write about a bunch of stuff, but as usual never answer the initial post objective. Conclusions are too mainstream.
       Greetings fellow citizens, and today we shall explore the genre of music most closely associated with math prodigies. Can it be hipster, or is it just high class?
    The funky thing about classical music is its older than the phonograph, so Beethoven doesn't have any solo albums, or compilations. And Bach never had any hits, or made a discography for himself. In fact, no classical music was recorded before Edison invented the technology, so we have no measure of what classical music was popular at the time. The only classical music we have is what we've found, and the only way they recorded it was on sheets of parchment. The only classical music that was underground then is underground now, and probably decomposed, literally. (get it decomposed?)
         But despite that, there are many more famous classical composers today, from back than, and likewise, less famous composers. If I played you Prelude and Fugue, you would probably recognize it. But for every classical song you have heard, there are probably 500 songs you haven't.
       But classical doesn't fit into the hipster genre, when it was created, it was excepted by everybody. Most educated people today still except it. I except it and respect it. But that's not the point of hipsters.
          But classical music is more complex and impressive than most of the music that is good today, so appreciate it, and if you write classical music, don't expect to be famous before you die, or even after that. The music is probably better off that day.
       Salutations
  Pablo y Nate

Are trendsetters hipster?

Well at first glance, the answer is a huge blaring blatant NO! However, doesn't a trend setter do something before it was popular and than by many unfortunate coincidences it catches public appeal?

          Greetings fellow hipsters, this post will be quite a morsel more substantial than my impulse post about hipster stereotype videos. Have you aver listened to a new band, worn a different type of clothing, or kept an odd animal as a pet and weeks later you find all of your peers attempting the same feat that you have? if so, i feel miserable for you and hope your depression diffuses. However reluctant you were you were and are and forever will be a one time trend setter. 

          I like to split trend setters into two basic groups, intentional trendsetters, and unintentional trendsetters. 

     An unintentional trend setter attempts to do something new and different and finds that every one is trying to mimic how different you are, making what you did the same as what others are doing and you are no longer one in a million, but one of a million. A relatively famous example of this, (not saying i encourage famous things or people) were the Russian urban climbers who climbed a radio tower and performed precarious stunts atop it, and late uploaded  video of their feat to you tube. Weeks later, another video arose of a group of teenagers on the withering heights of the same tower, and weeks later many video has arisen and many injuries and casualties had occurred.  

           Nothing good can come from trends, besides those who don't succumb to them.

      Those unintentional trend setters could be hipster, but the variables are to great, the trend could have been an accident and also the causing on the trending item could as well been inadvertent. The first potato chip was an accident, now lets see how much potato chip have influenced society, and obesity. If you are under twelve and have a sense of humor that is easy to please and you are interested in voodoo and potato chips, i suggest you read leon and the champion chip as it appeals to those who fit in those categories.

     Intentional trend setters are too starved for attention for me to talk about.

    Salutations,

Pablo y Nate 

     

This video made me angry

just watch the Argentinian woman and you will see why.

              Ill be making a more substantial post later, you will not be dissapointed. Be sure to comment on how mad this made you.
           Salutations,

Pablo y Nate.

Hipster rule # 462

          Rule# 462, when your friend tells you to listen to music, and offers you one ear bud, respond, "You probably have stereo headphones and I won't listen to your so-called music with one ear and miss half the song." I constantly do such whenever told to listen to music. The song is incomplete without both ears, which is why i insist you follow 456 and just listen to their music on your headphones, sure this will piss a bunch of people off, but we must fight for what we believe, if your ear buds only work in one ear, i encourage you to complain about them in the comments and buy a new pair.
            Salutations,


        Pablo y Nate.

Pet peeve: the asscociation with hipsters and skinny jeans.

    In tonight's episode of modern family, phil is sporting a remarkably tight fitted suit which strongly restricts his movement which he claimed to purchase at that "hipster store". Why is it a stereotype laced into pop-media that hipsters like to wearskin tight clothing? I have no freaking clue.      
         Greetings fellow circulation cutters, today I shall discuss skinny jeans, and by discuss I mean rant about skinny jeans, Particularly skinny jeans in abnormal colors. Why do people consider them hipster, so many people wear them, right? well I wouldn't know, ive never had the most authoritative grasp on what is popular with the children my age these days.
           Be that as it may, skinny jeans became popular under the prose that they were hipster, which makes very little sense, as if people wanted to look like a hipster they wouldn't wear the skinny jeans, as everybody else was encladding themselves in these tight fitting garments. However if the consumers actually wanted to be hipster, nobody would buy the pants in question, making them hipster to wear. But if they were in and they were hipster, would he hipsters no longer be abiding by rule 458 and getting fancy name brand denim, or would the non hipsters all be thrift shopping.
        The best thing to do when faced with a dilemma such as this is to get off my blog because you can't handle the hipster confusion. Its the opposite of wrinkly really: irony-ironic.  I think that the clothing you wear doesn't make you a hipster, it only makes you look like one. A hipster is not solely about physical appearance, its about what you are naturally. When you are going out of your way to be hipster, and/or not enjoying it, you know that you are doing something wrong. It is perfectly fine to not be a hipster, in fact the non hipsters and the hipsters have a symbiotic relationship, the non hipsters are the reason the hipsters exist, and hipsters provide the non hipsters with something to want to be.
     Leave comments about fashion trends that bug you below.

Salutions,

     Pablo y Nate

My jazz band from new york trying not to be a jazz band.

This song was performed by my jazz band.

                Here we perform a rock song featuring me, however it is not jazz, its more like a rock band with a large horn section and a conductor.
              salutations,
                 Pablo y nate.

Hipster rule #461

This weeks hipster rule: a bands earlier music is better.

         The red hot chili peppers, maroon 5, John Mayer, Green day, and many others were actually enjoyable to listen to before people enjoyed listening to them.
       Greetings, not hipsters. Today we shall take a journey into the past, to see if your favorite bands were actually good at one point. Don't worry, most of the music you listen to was always bad. Actually the only four I could come up with. But older, better, bands also had better days.
     Deep purple recently released the album "all the time in the world". I wasn't disappointed because I wasn't expecting it to be as good as the deep purple from the late 60's and the early 70's with john lord and Ritchie Blackmore. Pink Floyd was equally inspiring in pre Gilmour, and post Sid Barret days, but we all can agree that peter Gabriel sings better than Phil Collins, and though Fleetwood mac's late 70's and early eighties stuff was enjoyable enough, peter green was a better front man than Stevie Nicks. Speaking of Steve, the Steve Miller band had a few hits in the eighties, but songs like abracadabra just don't groove as much as their 1968 record, sailor.
            Moral:Hipsters never listen to what is current unless nobody has heard of it.
            All I say is an opinion, don't put any negative comments or they will be removed, though If you comment on what you disagree about, I would love to read it.
          
             Salutations,
        Pablo y Nate.

Long songs, and why they are delectable

    This is a follow up from my post on sunday.


           I was just halfway through mountain jam by the Allman brothers band, the first 18 minutes were pretty good.  
         Greetings, followers. today we delve into the expansive universe of songs that are longer than most people have the patients to listen to. Yesterday, I posted the 19 minute epic, grand deign, the link is in the last post, I personally doubt all of my views paid heed to all 19 minutes of musical goodness. Patience is a virtue that many lack in this ever hastening society we found forced upon us at birth. Personally, I like to test my patience, which sometimes to be volatile, listening to songs that require strong concentration to understand.
        The longest song in human history(long player) is little over a hundredth the way through. It has currently been playing since the turn of he millennium, however, it wont repeat itself till the year three thousand, but personally it is dull to listen too. It is sort of an ambiance, lacking theme or melody. Guinness may consider it a song, but I consider it an expansive art form.

The set of long player.

    But than, what is a "song". song, sang, sing. Does a song require singing? if so, Hurst's epic 44 minute contemporary classical composition, "the planets" is not considered a song. By that matter, nor is mountain jam.
     For that reason, I have divided art in the form of sound into two huge overlapping categories, auditory art, and melodic auditory art. Pretty self explanatory. For example, the beatles's revolution #9 fits into the category of auditory art.
     Sorry, for that sort of vsauce style departure from the topic.

    It bothers me that when confronted with led zeppelins stairway to heaven, most of the students in my grade cower. Lacking both the courage and open mindedness to accept that in comparison of other songs, it is not too lengthy, they claim that they will never listen to the full song because they have no time.
     I find long songs to be better than short songs, because the limiting factors of time are all but disbanded, free bird can have a 7 minute long guitar solo, and something in the way by nirvana can have ten minutes of silence in the middle of it. There can be nine parts to shine on you crazy diamond, and Robert fripp can experiment however much he wishes in moon child.
   Normally a to fit more lyrics in a song, nowadays, they are merely rapped for effiency. however, a whole story of really depressing crap are sung in most long pieces of auditory art. Also the comment wars below are more funny, if you listen on youtube.   
    Another hipster factor of long songs, it splitting songs into different parts, I.e neutral milk hotel's king of carrot flowers. It has a ring to it, _________________ pt VII. (hipster rule # 480: use the roman numeral system.
salutations,                                               Enter song title
 Pablo y nate.                     
   

Grand designs

 If you are a fan of the band dream theater, you will love this.
I am constantly amazed by the amount of talent people that nobody appreciates, please watch this video, because 258lemons needs to get a record deal.
        

Pet peeve: hipsters taking it to far.

This weeks pet peeve: hipsters taking it to far.
            

Being hipster is a choice, and we don't force our opinions on others, no matter how bad their taste in music is. What truly irks me is when a hipster refuses to participate in conversation, or likewise situations because something bugs them about the premises.
      Sadly, those hipsters are the only ones that seem to get noticed and they represent us poorly. Similar to arabs, most of us aren't radicals, but those are the ones you've heard of. Don't be ignorant readers. sometimes a might jokingly say to somebody, "I cant be your friend" when they don't know who Robert Fripp is. but I don't mean it. If you are a hipster, and you are ofeten more than a little bit difficult when you here pop music, than shame on you. Do you seriously want everybody to listen to your music? That would both take away the whole point of being hipster and what we have to complain about. We re meant to be the only ones who listen to our music, if more people than that, it wouldn't be hipster music.
   An example of this which to this day both amuses me and saddens me is when there were exchange students from Modi'im, Israel in my school in New York. There was a student, clad in a dream theater t-shirt, skinny jeans, and a fedora. This teenager was pleasant for the most part, however when their was a meeting with all of the hosts and all of the students, there was a Jason Mraz song playing in the video presentation.
    With many a complaint in Hebrew, the boy stormed from the room claiming he would not reenter till the music choice was changed. DON"T BETHAT GUY.
Have you ever had an experience with a hipster extremist, if so comment below. Hey! that's a couplet, did I mention I also write poetry.

salutations

nate y Pablo.

Hipster rule # 459

Interperate every thing as modern art, by claiming it represents the human condition or somethinglike that. make really simple art, example:  take a broken watering can and draw the word "hate" on it and claim the can represents society and its broken and pouring hate all over everybody. It makes you seem especially hipster if you appreciate the type of art where it is a blank canvas with a dot is the middle.


    If you like any modern art, comment below.
Salutaions,

Pablo y nate

Esme squalor: the ultimate not hipster

     Villainous and fashionable, the worst combination ever. Especially if the villainess in question is Esme Gigi Geniveve Squalor, an abomination fabricated by the elusive author, proclaiming himself lemony snicket. 
       A brief description of Esme. Esme is the cities 6th most important financial advisor living on the 66th floor of 667 dark avenue. She cheats on her husband and has a hobby of kidnapping children. She will do anything if its in. Esme is obsessed with whether something is "in" or "out", meaning trending or not. She will change the whole entire décor and garb just to keep her stature as the most "in" person in the world. If something is "out" she will shun and to away with the item in question, even if the item in question is three innocent orphans.
     Like most of Snicket's characters, she has a very opaque back story that we know very little of. But the real question is if being hipster was "in", what would Esme do?


    You have all been blown in the mind with my paradox. comment who you think is the least hipster character in a book.


salutations,

Pablo y nate.

Gingers have souls.

    Every day gingers are subject to cruelty and verbal abuse. As they struggle through life, they begin to question why they are persecuted. What spawned the belief that our fellow humans, red of hair, and noble of heart, are lacking their souls? For this we look to the most diabolical racist in the history of cartoon. Screw you eric cartman. You are the cause of a genocide of the pure, fire-headed carrot tops. You spread your lies for your own selfish reasons, just for laughs. You truly are a monster.                                                                                                                                                                                      

      Gingers make up only 1-2% of the worlds population, yet their influence is undeniable, they are all descendants of the Weasleys. 
      It is ridiculous to suggest that gingers don't have souls. Gingers are just as human as the rest of us, and more than most. Its so hipster to say that if your hair was on fie nobody would notice.
     One of my hipster friends from new York was ginger and he clearly believed he had a soul, as do my other ginger friends. in Detroit, I have met few gingers as of yet. The one I have met was kind enough to give me four baby carrots at lunch today, I showed her much gratitude by thanking her profusely  and saying her hair was more orange.
The one anomaly is the ginger who believes that gingers don't have souls. It is like being muggle born and calling your self a mudblood, speaking of witch(ha ha get it) i'm going to a very potter musical on Saturday.               
           Every body, please support gingers. If you see something like this.

Take a stand

 

 If your a ginger and you want your voice to be heard, comment below.

 

nate y Pablo

 

Is Luna Lovegood a Hipster

         Harry potter fans out there have all followed Harry Ron and Hermione to the end, Harry is the cool kid, ron is the ginger, Hermione is the nerd, But who is the hipster?

    Greetings my pop culture shunning friends, today we will be debating whether or not Luna Lovegood is a hipster.
Well the answer is an obvious yes, Luna is first introduced in the fifth harry potter book on the Hogwarts express reading an upside copy of a magazine nobody likes to read. She supported believed Voldemort before it was cool to believe that Voldemort was back. The backstory of the music of the wizarding world so i do not know if the wierd sisters are actually weird, but from the description of them at the yule ball in the goblet of fire i know one of them plays the lute. That is a hipster instrument ancient greek style.
At least she doesn't listen to Celestina Warbach.
True, luna does not actually wear glasses, but her necklace of butter-beer corks, her radish earrings, and her obsession with crumple horned snorckacks does the trick.
  Luna, we hipsters salute thee.
Nate y Pablo

Hats.

        Hats: Noun, something that most hipsters have, but none can agree on which is most hipster.



     Greetings all, before I begin today, i'd like to make a few shout outs. First to all my viewers especially the ones from out of the country, second to Motown guitars. When I moved to Detroit, I was quite worried about where I would by guitars. There was a sketchy looking store near my house in new York where all the hipsters would go and buy music gear. This place was called the sound source. If you're from upstate new York, I strongly recommend it. Though sometimes lacking in variety of instruments, the sound source shop worker dudes were some of the more hipster people I've met. We knew each other by name and they sold things inexpensively. Today, while buying a new set of guitar strings, I came across a store with two huge les pauls on the facade, angling towards the ground opening for the doorway of the store.
    The place was huge, and there were many guitars and pedals and amps and accessories sold inexpensive.




Hats.

Hipster hats According to some





Hipster hat according to others

\

       What is a hipster hat. What is it's purpose? I'm actually drawn ablank hear because I wear my fedoras every day and people always ask if its a hipster hat, but I get the same affect if I wear a beanie. Why do hipsters need a hat style.
      Giving a group of people a particular attribute may make them appear unified, however hipsters are more versatile than non hipsters as there is so much more stuff that is not popular than stuff that is. So a hipster doesn't need to wear only one type of hat. This is how fashion works in the hipster world.

Sal

u

t

a

t

I

o

n

s

Nate y Pablo

Why i don't like proffesional sports

            Yes, playing cricket or ultimate Frisbee with your acquaintances is an enjoyable experience for some, and mortifying for other, and in the middle for me, but the world of professional sports has never appealed to me since the year 2009. Partially because my team was steadily growing more and more horrendous, and partially because they were beginning to bore me, I have  not followed a sport religiously since.t
          There is a certain lack of enthusiasm. Last night I found myself at a pistons game. Just moments before the game commenced, I was crowded into the side of the entrance to the court, hand extended into the center of this pathway of humans. Camera's were flashing, pop music was blaring and I was doing the best to ignore it. In the gravity of the situation, I was momentarily oblivious as what was about to undergo.
       The Detroit pistons, all 15 of them, jogged through the entrance towards the human tunnel, tall enough to dwarf a relatively small elephant, and clad in red and white sweat suits. Man, I thought, i'm going to get an awesome high five from these hulks.
     As they approached, the anticipation built. The first player was upon us. Sheepishly, I extended my arm farther. What happened next Is sad to behold. The high five wasn't exactly a high five. Imagined getting a sloth hitting a punching bag and divide the strength of the hit by five, plus the basketball players weren't furry, so it was less fun.
    NOOO, my mind was racing. This cant be, why didn't I get a real high five? With luck the others will be better. But no luck was to be found, for each high five was successively more noncommittal. My expectations were in shambles.

Another thing that irks me about sports is how concrete they are. Unlike music, where everything is up to opinion(besides the fact that 80's hair metal, synthpop and modern rap are the worst kinds of music), sports have stats, e.r.a, shooting percentage, number of yards, blinks per game. There is also little creativity.  Referees  carry rule books twice the size of the Mirian Webster dictionary, or all the wheel of time books combined, and there is an argument about whether or not a rule was broken after every play.   Sports is just like a religion that encourages war amongst it's followers and your emotional stature depends purely on the competence bunch  of or women you don't know.

And there is a clear winner.

One can argue that you can measure music by how many labels are sold, or critics reviews, but whether or not the music is pleasurable to you is completely by choice of the listener. You can barrate somebody for liking the wrong music in your opinion, but for sports you have less options on what to follow and you have no control of their success, but if you change alliegances it is consifers blasphemous.

So, with all due respect, don't get into a fight with your friend over sports, fight over music,


Nate and Pablo.



         

A Porquia Tale Of Nutella.

           Once upon a time their was a expansive colony of socialist hazel nuts named hazelville. All the hazel nuts lived lives filled with the trivial nut troubles. At the end of the day they all went to sleep in their nut houses and dreamt really nutty dreams. One night, one very reclusive and enigmatic hazel nut named hazel decided that their existence was for naught. All a hazel nut ever did was partake in many trivial dishes, and many trivial beverages.
        Distraught and lonely, hazel spent many a night awake in bed, shifting positions and making many  a trip to the kitchen for many a midnight snack. After many hours of this tedium, hazel came the conclusion that she should consult the tribunal of grand hazel nuts.
      The next day, hazel dressed up in her nicest kilt and rain poncho and made haste towards the parliament buildings of hazelville. When she arrived, she stepped on the grand pedestal and was subject to meticulous scrutinization of the three leaders of the mundane abode of many a hazel nut.
    "Hazel," boomed the grand hazelnut of hazelville's treasury and economy, "to what do I owe this displeasure."
    "Yes, enlighten us on the essence of this lethargic litigation." drawled the head hazel nut of foreign affairs and trade.
      "I wish to voice a suggestion to our very style of society. What are we but nuts in a world where a nut is nothing. The usurper, the peanut chieftain is not but a legoon, never was it a true nut. Living in their reclusive fortresses, the pistachios still wont hear our pleas. Day after day, you do nothing of these woes, from the land of the sugar plum fairy, a legion of incarnated nutcrackers are reeking havock on the country side, and you sit here, spending our tax money on Jacuzzis and Mercedes benz cars. We need to rise from the monotony of out lives. We must strive to be more that coffee at starbucks. Please hear me out."
        "We care not of you insufferable accusations of incompetence in our government, none of it I will pay heed to. Be gone."
         Before she could react, police nuts emerged from crevices in the walls and dragged her by the ear from the immense estate.


        An hour later, while crying on a park bench outside a yoga workout center, she met the hipster.

And that is why we have nutella.

Why Hipsters don't like things that are mainstream.

         As a hipster, I commonly strive to bring new odd Avant-garde and previously undiscovered interests into the community. The people who choose to listen to my suggestions in music and literature are followers. The reason I like finding things nobody has thought of before is because it makes one feel an individual. The average person has various amounts of ideas shoveled onto them like their a patch of farmland, and these popular beliefs are like heaps of manure, fresh clean and stinking to high heaven.

      The poor patch of farmland has no time to filter what is being loaded upon it and whether or not he wants all that crap on him at all. It can't decide whether the new mulch is better than the old mulch is better, but the farmer forces upon the new processed cheapest and most popular brand of industrialized animal droppings. Likewise, the farmland has no say of what plants grow out.
         If the farmland was a hipster instead of a patch of dirt in the middle of nowhere, it would have these choices, and his self proclamation as hipster would develop a shield to society around it. Maybe instead of growing kale, which is mainstream, it could sprout habaneros or bok choy. The farmer could blend these two veggies and make a type of Chinese Mexican chili. The farmer of course would be very dependent of his pitchfork.
          Those who are into what is current are slaves to popular culture. They need to read fashion magazines, watch pretty little liars and listen to #1 hit radio. Being hipster is like having a burden lifted off your shoulders with the perk of finding better and more interesting sources of entertainment. Forget about team gale vs team Jacob, you could be reading the odyssey or the complete works of Edgar Allen Poe. A hipster, a nerd, a geek and an art fart don't worry about appearing cool, which makes them cool in their own way. So next time you are buying an 80$ pair of jeans at A&F, ask yourself, "What the hell am i doing?"

If you are in a loopy enough mood, break out in song.

If you do post the video on the internet and leave a link in the comments.

Don't be a patch of smelly kale plants, be original like bok choy.

Salutations,

Nate.